a hibernation session is long overdue for beans. i need to find myself again. the only way to do that is to hide. hide with myself, that is. ive been letting all the wrong ppl get the best of me. it ends now. anxiety is at a all time high and unfortunately love is at an all time low. its going to be a rough winter, folks. stay warm.
for your listening endeavors:
the roots ft big k.r.i.t -make my...
i have it on repeat as i work on a couple of projects i have up my sleeves. soon to be discussed. stay tuned.
ahhhh! the life of beans is a simple one. the complexity of my schedule is whats gets me though. i catch myself apologizing for my leaves of absence on flavorless beans all too often so instead of going through the ordeal of bullcrap excuses, lets just catch up!
i have recently undergone some sort of enlightenment of the mind that i, myself am still unsure how to explain. my heart aches. the type of ache that i thought could never be healed. as days, weeks and months pass, i realize how much more i need and miss....................................him with me. i've consumed my daily life with activities to keep me busy. from school to work to the gym, i have been able to keep my mind off this never ending ache. i have come to realize that instead of filling my schedule with empty activities to run away from this pain, i need to come to terms with it (with myself, really).
a friend of mine (my favorite mexican, miss nere, ofcourse) invited me a couple of months back to a yoga class with her. and since ive been attempting to drop a pound or two or 12, i went in the hopes it would help me lose weight. what i took away became much more than inches off my waist. my breathing and the connection between my body and mind has been strengthen and has resulted in a more peaceful beans. the ache is there and will forever be a part of me, but i feel closer to him and in return have become one with myself again which relieves some of the pain associated with him leaving me.
it helps that the place ive been going to is AMAZING. the name of the practice is power vinyasa at a chain of studios named YOGA TO THE PEOPLE. it is a donation based teaching with locations in the east village area, midtown and now brooklyn! the vibe is so relaxed and the teachers are phenomenal. i definitely recommend it to anyone whether you need a great workout or in for a mentally soothing experience. check out the link for more info!
disney presents: AFRICAN CATS! only playing one day april 22nd?! AND a donation will be made to protect the savanna and its inhabitants?! the question is ...where do i preorder my tickets? if you know me, you know the affinity i have for the wild. this is definitely my "type" of flick. excited is an understatement.
"in an untamed land, every mother has one mission: PROTECT HER FAMILY"
you have been one of my favorite artists since the days that i attempted to kick, push. i have been nothing but loyal since then. for you to put out LASERS as it has leaked right now, is big wad of spit in my face. in the faces of all the fans. it is not the lupe, i fell in love with. i thought i was your sunshine. fuck, LASERS is not even the type of record i can even say i barely like. i had to do the double take as i heard the trey songs track. is this really lupe fiasco? or is this some drake or justin bieber wannabe? seriously. the only way i can bare to listen to LASERS now is if i hit shuffle on my entire lupe playlist and forget, it ever existed as its own entity. i have stayed on top of all the tracks that leaked early through online magazines, twitter and facebook and i was impressed. i kept telling myself this is no doubt the most anticipated album of the year (sorry, dre). i regret to admit that listening to it as a whole was the most mind numbing pain ive been put through since my last dentist visit. radio single after radio single is NOT an album, its a cheap excuse into making more money. i dont give a fuck as to what the label allowed you to put out, how could you put your name on something you didnt believe in?! i cant bring myself to say that you sold out on the fans, but just know a little bit of respect has been lost. talk about DUMBING IT DOWN smfh
i was consumed with excitement as i waited in the frigid, February weather to see you perform in williamsburg, nyc. this would be the 3rd time seeing you live and your stage presence has been and still is uncanny. i get lost with you. i thought LASERS would have that same effect on me. ive been sadly mistaken. until next time, right? i'll be awaiting what you have in store for THE GREAT AMERICAN RAP ALBUM.
pardon the horrible video quality. i was in the midst of maddness.
the girl who allowed hip-hop to save her life
love always shines. everytime. remember to smile. ::sigh::
forgive me, dearest followers. i havent posted in weeks and yet the profile views have been going up so someone out there is reading. "i appreciate that" ::hov voice::
whats been going on in the life of BEANS OF FURY, you ask? quite a bit going on, i suppose.
classes are getting pretty intense and im actually falling behind on quite a few readings. i think my love for learning is slowly starting to deteriorate. my attention span feels like that of a 6 year old ...only way to keep my attention is by showing me fun colors and a ice cream bar. ive vowed to get my act together this week. im actually blogging right now as a lecture is going on. professor is discussing the patterns of use of LSD. i should take tips. kidding! call upon the gods!
ive been challenging out my inner woman lately and been hitting spatulas against pots and pans, mixing water with oil, defrosting and burning etc ...you catch my drift lol in other words, ive been attempting to master the art of cooking. ive been treating my taste buds to dinner all this week with the help of mr. beyond, of course. in fear of turning this post into a julie/julia rip off i'll stop right here. i might post my recent creations for your viewing pleasure soon.
i havent treated myself to to a beautiful destruction in quite some time. im on it this weekend. a co workers bday on friday, another friends baby shower on saturday and the lupe fiasco show in williamsburg on sunday. im booked so take a number, loves!
currently listening so many goodies, there just arent enough hours in the day!
morning mr magpie -radiohead
all mine - portugal. the man.
suburban war- arcade fire
...just in one of those moods. check them out, if you havent done so already.
What else? flavorless needs some flavor. im looking into giving this blog a makeover. beans of fury is a contender for the new name. kidding, again?! jeeze! tough crowd lol seriously, i need some assistance with graphic design. any takers? hit me up, kids!
...off to understand the cognitive and physical effects of LSD. ciao, ciao!
ive been sentenced to bed rest for the past couple of days (infected with the sickness! ...strep throat and a fever). missed 2 days of class and 1 day of work (ugh!) i hate falling behind especially on here. whats worth mentioning, in the life and times of beans? lets see. last week, mr lupe fiasco had tweeted all his followers of a surprise in store for anyone showing up at union square, new york. i, among a couple other thousand fans went running! i was expecting a batman-like signal in the sky and while it wasnt the greatest of all surprises, i'll be the first to admit, the over all energy was awesome! traffic was stopped as lupe had his LASERS logo projected onto the side of a nearby building. lupe clearly let the city know the anticipation of LAZERS is not to go underlooked!
a small snapshot of what caused union madness:
i came across the LASERS tracklist. a lot of MDMA hmmmm ...enjoy:
01. Letting Go (Feat. Sarah Green) 02. Words I Never Said (Feat. Skylar Grey) 03. Till I Get There 04. I Don’t Wanna Care Right Now (Feat. MDMA) 05. Out Of My Head (Feat. Trey Songz) 06. The Show Goes On 07. Beautiful Lasers, (Two Ways) (Feat. MDMA) 08. Coming up (Feat. MDMA) 09. State Run Radio (Feat. Matt Mahaffey) 10. Break The Chain (Feat. Eric Turner & Sway) 11. All Black Everything 12. Never Forget You (Feat. John Legend)
busy schedule of work and class today. yes, the spring semester is upon us! im currently enrolled in 2 classes: THERAPEUTIC INTERVENTIONS IN CHEMICAL DEPENDENCY and GROUP DYNAMICS IN CHEMICAL DEPENDENCY. a mouth full to say the least but im hella excited! my kickboxing class begins tomorrow. positivity consumes me.
counting down the days to LASERS! i swear its not just a long awaited album. its a movement! without further adue and for your listening pleasure...
LOVE. ALWAYS. SHINES. EVERYTIME. REMEMBER to SMILE.
not a huge fan of r&b, i'll admit, buttttt if there is one female artist that i respect and deserves recognition on blackbean31.blogspot it has to be miss aaliyah. i just found out her birthday passed as did my brothers. needless to say, it hasnt been a good week for me. my head is all over the place. from financial stress to issues of loyalty, im sooooo lucky to have mr.beyond (my somebody) to run to. he makes life worth loving and is definitely my reason to smile nowadays.
i remember coming home to my brother telling me she was in a fatal airplane accident. we put on hot97 and just listened her jam. i remember feeling so sad, like i really lost someone i cared about. who would of thought i would sit here today experiencing that same loss to the tenth power AHHHHH! ::sigh:: heres to aaliyah. she was dope as fuck. sing to my brother as you rest in peace, darling.
and heres a word from our sponsors....
gusy, youre in music heaven. chillin with all the greats. im quite envious.
hello, fellow blogsters! how ive missed you so! time to catch up. first in the agenda? ...i have crossed over into the wild. the wild world of twitter that is. i'll admit, i cheated on fb, i created an account years ago, tweeted twice, got dressed and bounced lol ....well, things arent that simple nowadays, i went crying back begging to be taken seriously again HA! anyhow, cant get enough of me? feel free to follow me, loves. @j_rooks31. kinda sounds like my rap name or something lol
currently obsessed with- the auctioning of the 1992 batmobile featured in batman returns. i want? hellFUCKINGyeah! ::starts collection can of nicks and dimes:: if you catch my drift
ahhhh! lookie what i found. oh dear, dear ::looks around:: i think i've wet myself:
march 8th's album cover. excited? understatement of the decade :)
currently smell like- an awkward situation
throwback memory of the day-
the little DRUNK sister and I at our cousin's wedding this past summer. my little christian enthusiast had the first drink and a half of her life and was feeling niceeeeee. instead of raising that wooden cross to sweet 8 lb baby jesus, lets just say the wine bottle was getting bean-like amore. hilarious, to say the least. we have our up's and god knows we have our
downs, buttttttt this girl right here is my heart. and i know i dont say it enough, but i love her more than anything left on this planet. my little motivation to do anything.
currently listening to-
currently praying for- A WIN! vamos, mi barcelona! VAMOS!!!
while its not the gorillaz that i fell head over heels for, its nonetheless new music which im in dire need of. it was supposedly created all on a single ipad while on tour. 15 tracks is very impressive, but still a bit reluctant to label it genius. i am however giving it a chance and all my flavorless readers should too.
2010 changed me. him leaving me to rest in peace affects me every single day. some days are more difficult than others. some days destroy me and leave me with little will power to do anything really. other days motivate me to be everything he was or IS in our lives. to be more than just a daughter or more than just a sister within my family. 2010. literally, a year of heartache. ive lost more than i could ever describe, but in that loss, hope found me. love found me. LIFE found me.
my soul has been overcome with optimism for 2011. if all goes according to plan (which it never does, but i embrace spontaneity so fuck it) ...i'll be registering for classes in February. theres a substance abuse counseling license that john jay offers after completing the BA program, but before having to do the master's program. my little brown-beaned eyes are on it. im only a couple of credits away to obtaining the license since the majority of the classes i took for my BA fall into the same criteria. shouldnt be too difficult. the main squeeze and i are planning a trip to spain some time in the early summer hopefully. it will become our soccer hiatus (ironcally, currently watching the valencia 1/espanyol 1 game) and lastly which is of most importance to me is hooking up my attic apartment. its been an long overdue project. ive painted so i really need to put my little interior decorating skills to work and furnish my love pad :)
i thought this was very appropriate for the overall vibe of this post:
i've grown a deep, overwhelming hatred for filling out 'about me' sections. mostly b/c i dont know how to put emotions, beliefs, or thoughts into words, that i suppose form sentences, that in return turn into paragraphs, that magically look like pages, that somehow appear to be books, that suddenly emerge into brilliance. since i have no clue how to do just that, i've decided to give blogger said responsibility & do it for me. this is just a peek, just a glimpse, just a taste into the things that interest me, that may interest you. that is all. indulge & wipe along side me as i share my taste in music, fashion, politics, books, food, every day life. this blog had been adopted as 'personal' due to the belief that no one actually read it, but requests to add new posts on a daily basis have been requested so for your viewing pleasure ::curtains open:: exits are to your right and to your left. ENJOY the show. the little sister says i belong in church b/c i speak in tongues lol that being said, PLEASE do not take any posts personally. most of which are drunken/high metaphoric rambles. your opinions are expected, encouraged and enjoyed.