morning breath thoughts

how do you let someone know you miss them and need them in your life without actually telling them you miss them and need them in your life? i dont even know why i'm posting this. the person meant to see it, never will. i'm a coward ::sigh:: beans without the black is just flavorless.

i'm a woman of visuals, not words.

i'm contemplating the 5th tattoo (already? ...i know) and i think i'm just going to hold my breath, close my eyes and invest into the half sleeve. why not? my imagination is getting the best of me and intends to leave my pockets empty. its going to be a collective piece crawling its way into the $500 or maybe $600s. ehhh. i'm leaving bills and debt at the bus terminal and hopping on the express line to permanentville. fuck it.

"ouch"

food for thought.

"i used to love her" as in: "i used to love old nyc"

when all that mattered in 1999 was 5cent now-a-laters numbing all sensation on my tongue ::sighs::

i just came back from a month long journey in ecuador. apart from an added 10 lbs and a half destroyed liver i came back with a whole new perspective. on life. on society. and nyc just doesnt seem the same anymore. how does so much poverty go overlooked? how can the government get away with so many injustices? i dont know. over there a family can be fed with a dollar. one. and here? ppl whining about useless "necessities" (the iPad? come on. get real. apple, i love you so, but COME ON!) i've been left speechless. let the world change you and you'll want to change the world. deadass.

-habichuelas

this right here turned me on. a little.

...ok. a lot.

as this trip comes to a bittersweet end, i cant help, but reminisce..

my dad always tells the same story: winter of ´92
JFK airport: destination: guayaKILL, ecuador

...there she is, little homeslice. innocent as can be con su papito at the gate waiting to board a delayed flight. needless to say, how the weather teeth-chatters in nyc days before christmas. little homeslice is bundled up in her coat, hat, scarf, gloves and snowboots (the works). refusing to take any of it off, she sits hand in hand con su papito and looks out the ceiling high windows at the perfectly, snow covered city. what looks like vanilla frosting over a cake of love leaves her mouth wattering. finally getting the "ok" to board after waiting for what seemed like an eternity, they land 6 hours later to 100 degrees of memories...


pops- "ya janicita saquese el co, estamos en ecuador. aqui hace calor"
janice- "no papi. es cold. es cold"

...oh how i wish some things would never, ever change.

and thats just a little something of what will one day be my 1st published children´s book

fuggs (the 'fuck uggs' movement)

you just gotta love nyc. theres not a day that goes by where i dont see someone or something that leaves my jaw dropped and my eyes widened. theres one fashion statement catching my eye time and time again. male uggs? ::SHAKING MY HEAD, SHAKING MY HEAD, SHAKING MY HEAD::: guys, this is not cool. like at all. i dont care how bitterly cold the weather is and if it's causing all your toes to fall off. uggs are a definite NO. no one should wear footwear that looks like socks. socks are socks. uggs shouldnt even be acceptable for the ladies. i woulda let it slide in 2007, but come on, toss the uggs and start a newly sour-tasting trend (sorry to rain on the parade, but the 80 bucks could be better spent on booze or something. at least that will guarantee some more appealing to the male species with an added squint, ofcourse) guys, whatever happened to the classic winter foot-wear? beef & brocs? constructs? any of which will keep your feet both warm and dry ::sigh:: simplicity is key! i guess i'm just a 1990s soul living in the wrong decade.

for the record, these are not cool either.

neither are these.

i apologize for what probably sounds like complaining and crying, but it's just so annoying how the ugliest (and not to mention corniest) shit gets deemed cool and everyone hops on the bandwagon to cop. originality, people! please use protection and use originality wisely. that is all. (for now) please walk responsibly.

-habichuelas

MARCH 5TH 2010

omgggg i dont think ive been this excited about anything since i found out crust-less bread was sold by the loaf. deadass. to say this is a must-see is an understatement. johnny depp? tim burton? classic. edward scissorhands-kind-of-classic. come away with me.

a mean shoe game? lets talk about it.

juicy couture birdie booties retail for $274

fuck it. stuff makes me happy.

-beans.

MY KIND's YOUR KIND <3

uuuurrrrrgggghhhhh

i know i've said this before on more than one occasion. i guess some ppl didnt get the memo. WTF, man?! there's nothing i hate more than ppl telling me whats good for me. try this on for size: JANICE knows whats good for HER. deadass. so stop. i dont wanna fuckin hear it. you wanna see crazy? i'll show you fuckin crazy.

that is all.

21st Annual NYC Cares Coat Drive

i've been looking at things from a very different perspective lately and saw an advertisement on the subway a few days ago. i took it as a sign. as fucked up as i think my life may be, truth of the matter is, a lot of people have it way worse. complaining never created change. action creates change. so from now through december 31st, i want to be part of a change movement (i was so meant to live during the 70s when the youth stood for something lol). PLEASE join me, many of the other generous new yorkers and donate your gently used coats. instead of leaving them to collect dust in the back of your closets, why not help someone keep warm this winter? it's easy.

weekdays, 7am to 9:30am, drop them off at:

-42nd street grand central terminal

-times square port authority bus terminal

-34th street penn station

next? i'm thinking of passing by a health clinic before my dec 26 month-long trip to ecuador to pick up as many free condoms as i can get my hands on. i'm planning on giving them out not only to guys, but girls as well in the streets of ecuador. sadly, condoms in ecuador are a luxury and not many can afford them hence why several of my 14 year old cousins living out there are already parents. i dont even want to think about how many teenagers are out there walking around with STD's as well (smh) shits are free here!!! thats crazy. ecuador, like many other latin american countries, preaches abstinence rather than safe sex. clearly, its not working. so, the rebel that i am and always have been, will be taking it upon myself to (try) and change that. although, i may get looked at wrong or even get rocks thrown at me (as my dad commented when i told him about this idea lol) i'm really looking forward to doing this. if i get at least 1 person practicing safe sex, it will be worth it.

-beans

"i'm jay guevara with bling on" :)

vitamins for kids?

E pills with the image of our dear president, Barack Obama, have hit the streets. this is not a hoax, folks. a stash of these were found in the back of a truck driver's van during a routine Texas traffic stop. "The drugs look like a 'vitamin for kids' police spokesman," Lenny Sanchez, said. LMAO imagine though? "here billy, take your vitamins to make you super happy and super hyper" lol i'm not gonna lie. i kinda wanna swallow barack. ha.

i, in no way whatsoever, condone drug abuse. enjoy responsibly, guys.

check out: ecstasydata.org know what you're taking.

kid cudi in max "wild things" costume

this is why, this man right here leaves me speechless <3

juvenile criminal personality study?

"From very early, the oxygen of the criminal's life is to seek excitement by doing the forbidden."-Stanton Samenow

my mind is brainstorming so many ideas as to what i want to focus my main research/experimental study on upon graduation in may 2010. i'm a forensic psychology major with a concentration in juvenile delinquency at john jay college of criminal justice and it has always been an interest of mine to figure out why some juveniles commit crime and others do not. i want to go deeper than the superficial reasons of the "bad influences" excuse or the "i'm from a poor neighborhood and had no other means" bandwagon. there has to be more. there just has to be. can crime be linked to individuals that share specific personality traits? hmmmm after researching yochelson and samenow's rehabilitating criminals work, i've been inspired. whats the correlation of those personality trait sharing juveniles and substance abuse? my mind is just running wild with so many theories.

well, as interesting as this is to me, i'm sure not everyone shares this same passion. so i'll stop with the snore fest.

(back to our scheduled programming)

-beans

on sunday morning

ppl who have never always ask "what does it feel like?" i can only answer one way. "its like randomly meeting your soulmate, falling in love within a day and then waking up the next day and realizing it was all a dream." its beautiful. but its destruction. i feel like shit.